Memorial Day, 2005

2005-05-30 - 9:49 a.m.

First off, a joke.

Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together, discussing how important their children are.

The first one tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."

The second Catholic woman chirps, "Well, my son is a bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace'."

The third Catholic woman says smugly, "Well, not to put you down, but my son is a cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, people say 'Your Eminence'.

The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence. The first three women give her a subtle, "Well...?"

She replies, "My son is a gorgeous, 6' 2" hard-bodied, well-hung male stripper. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, "My God..."

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Second, a 'what-the-fuck-is-happening-to-music' moment:

From Yahoo! News:

Phone Ring Tone Set to Top U.K. Charts
Sun May 29, 8:30 AM ET

LONDON - A cell-phone ring tone appeared set to top the British singles chart Sunday, outselling the new single by the band Coldplay by nearly four to one, a music retailer said.

"Crazy Frog Axel F," a ring tone based on the sound of a revving Swedish mo-ped, is the first tune being used on mobile phones to cross into mainstream music charts, said Gennaro Castaldo, a spokesman for HMV, the British music retailing chain.

Coldplay had hoped to go straight to No. 1 on this Sunday's British singles chart with its new song, "Speed of Sound." But by Saturday, it appeared that the ring tone � which is available for digital download and as a compact disc single � would prevail, said Castaldo.

The ring tone was expected to replace the Oasis tune "Lyla" as the No. 1 hit on the list released Sunday by the Official UK Charts Co. The weekly singles chart, which has been released since 1952, is based on the sales of 5,600 retail shops across Britain.

While "Crazy Frog" and other ring tones do not appear to be much of a hit among adults, so many youngsters are personalizing the sound of their cell phones that such digital music could change world music markets.

"Music purists might not be too happy at the prospect of the "Crazy Frog" outselling Coldplay, but it shouldn't come as that much of a surprise when you consider its huge novelty appeal and the massive amount of exposure it is currently getting," said Castaldo.

The ring tone is based on a song that was recorded in Sweden nearly a decade ago by 17-year-old Daniel Malmedahl, using the high pitched revving of a two-stroke motorcycle, The International Herald Tribune reported Saturday.

You have GOT to be kidding me.

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Today is the big cookout at Nelson's sister's house. The only difference this year from every other function at his family's, will be the absence of Nelson's racist brother-in-law's antics and slurs.

I'll sure miss that, I tell ya.

I'm sure the divorce cannot come soon enough for Nelson's sister.
She deserves much better than that.

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Public service announcement: If you drink, please do not drive. Thanks.

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Apparently, a parade marched through town while I slept.

So that's why I dreamed I was being trampled by a high school marching band!

Just kidding.

Have a great holiday!