The lamp that stole my belt

2005-02-22 - 1:32 a.m.

Earlier today -- actually, later last night (it's after midnight) -- I had some issues. I will most likely be called in for an interview for this potential job, and I recently purchased a new outfit to wear for said interview. It's a nice outfit. A light creme-colored pair of khakis, and a light creme-colored shirt with light blue and black vertical stripes. (Slimming, you see.) I also grabbed a nice pair of black shoes at Payless, which goes with the outfit ONLY if the belt is worn. The belt is black, thus tying the shirt to the shoes, and the slacks to the shirt. It's the defining piece to the ensemble.

So why did I have isses? I lost the fucking belt! I looked everywhere. I ripped apart every dresser, looked in the closets, I even took all of the pants out of the hamper to see if I left it in any of the belt loops. Nope.

I then decided to retrace my steps. When was the last time I wore the belt? Ah, yes! The day I got fired! So I looked again (for the eleventeenth time) in and around the slacks that I wore that day. Nope.

Well, needless to say, I am not a quitter. I found the damn belt. Where?

In. A. Lamp. How does one lose a belt in a lamp? Easy. Here is a photo of the culprit:

When I saw it there, it was like I relived the whole thing. I arrived home after being fired, and in my time of disorientation, I removed the belt, rolled it up, and placed it inside the lamp. (Bottom photo) It was around the little nightlight that my mother made for me as a Yule gift. (The photo is blurry, which leads me to believe our digital camera is on the 'outs') I tried to explain the lamp and the situation to Brin, but probably came across as a complete twit. So let me explain where the lamp came from...

My mother took a cartoon image that I drew in Microsoft Paint (on my computer) of Nelson and I, she printed it, and then attached it to the front of a lamp that she picked up in a thrift shop and refurbished. I love it. My mother is extremely crafty.

But don't let that adorable little lamp fool you. It's a belt thief, you know.

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Nelson and I just finished popping some corn and watching "Meet the Fockers". (Don't ask how, please...) Hilarious flick! I laughed so hard I cried. Can't wait for the DVD release to watch it a second, third, and fourth time!

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Okay. That's it for me tonight. I'm going to bed. Have a terrific night everyone! And for the love of all things good -- do not trust your light fixtures. :-P

Jamie